I’m in a Faux Fur of Emotion

12 Feb I’m in a Faux Fur of Emotion

Posted at 09:00h in All by

So, full disclosure? It’s that time of the month. Yuck, TMI, I know but still, I think that matters with what I’m about to say.

I feel like a crazy person. Super overwhelmed and scared, almost interchangeably. The broad spectrum that my emotions bounce up and down on a daily basis is insane. I saw a the cutest little brown girl sitting in the train station with her mom last night, having snacks (eww to eating on a subway platform, though) and telling her about her day. And I got so sad. I miss my mom. I just want her to tell me that everything is going to be okay. That I will find an apartment, I will make it through New York Fashion Week without a cold, and I better shut up and enjoy the ride because I asked to be here.

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The thing is, I know this is normal. I’ve met enough people who moved to New York with a suitcase and have made it work. Arianna did. Serena is going through the same exact thing, right now, but in California. I know that is all apart of the growing process. And as much as I wish I had my mom here to hold my hand–yes, I’m 26 and want my mom, so what–I know that this is something I had to do for myself. The only reason that I am talking about this now, on here, is because in a week or a month, when everything is fine, I just want to look back at this and be like, you were so worried, and for what?

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The space between being comfortable and uncomfortable is where the blessings are. I don’t want to miss them–I’ll just keep repeating that to myself.

Oh, and for everyone who’s called/texted/emailed me to make sure that I’m okay, I’m alive. I’m not ignoring you. I’m just one of those people who tuck their chin in and buckle down until things well enough to be among the world again. I remember listening to a speaker at the Independent Fashion Bloggers Conference last September who said that being in New York lights a fire under your behind like no other because you need to be able to pay rent.

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He wasn’t lying.

I’m ready, New York. Come at me, Bro.

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  • Serena
    Posted at 11:54h, 12 February

    HAKUNA MATATA

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:15h, 15 February

      What a wonderful phrase… dun da dun da da… it means no woooooorrrrriiiiies for the rest of your days… AH sing it kid!

  • Eboni Ifé
    Posted at 13:09h, 12 February

    Channy Poo!!! You’re gonna be just fine.  New York ain’t even ready for all the talent and fabulousness you’re about to unleash on it.  Keep your head up, and stay strong! 

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:14h, 15 February

      Thank you, Eb! When are you coming to NY? We have a date!

  • Eugenia Russell Hargrove
    Posted at 13:26h, 12 February

    …..As she throws the mike down!!! 

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:12h, 15 February

      DONE! LOL, you’re so silly! You’ve been waiting to say that in a sentence, haven’t you??

  • Daniella
    Posted at 15:19h, 12 February

    Aw you’ll be great honey! It’s good that you’re getting of your chest 🙂 I love your look honey, you look fabulous 🙂

    Take care,
    Daniella xox

  • JIN @ LOVE,LOSS + LACQUER
    Posted at 16:43h, 12 February

    You’ve got this in the bag Channing! Growing Pains are normal…you’re going to be just great! Congratulations again 🙂

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:07h, 15 February

      Thank you, Jin! I hope you and the baby are well :))

  • Joy and Sunshine
    Posted at 20:07h, 12 February

    Channing, you’ve GOT this! The city is made for you, and before you know it, you’ll be on the other side of this obstacle, schooling others on how to conquer. If you need your mom, I’m sure she’ll be on the next thing smoking to NYC. There’s no shame in asking for help when you’re doing the best you can. Just remember: you already have what it takes 🙂 You’ve. Got. This. No doubt.

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:07h, 15 February

      I love this, Erica. Thank you so much.  I saved this for future reference. 

  • Taliah Ferguson
    Posted at 11:08h, 13 February

    Awww hang in there Channing! You look lovely doll! Good luck and i hope you received your package! 😉

    Taliah

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:06h, 15 February

      Thank you, Taliah! I did receive the package! Shall Instagram it soon ;))

  • Arianna
    Posted at 21:46h, 13 February

    #YOLO! You’ve already taken the most important step, which is getting here. I can’t wait to read about all your adventures here in the city!

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 15:05h, 15 February

      YOLO!  Thank you, Boo! Seriously, for helping me through.

  • Ashley
    Posted at 20:34h, 14 February

    I’m still so excited about your move to NY. I see you are getting into the swing of things. I am upset that we didn’t get to meet up but God willing I will be back in the Fall 🙂 Cute outfit. You layer sooooo well. I’m taking notes 🙂

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 12:49h, 15 February

      Thank you, Ashley! Come back in the summer, it will be much better 😉 Thank you, I hate being cold so I have to layer!

  • Nika
    Posted at 20:48h, 15 February

    Aww Channing I know the feeling. I am still getting settled in and used to L.A. and there are days I still pinch myself. Moving to a new place can be scary but as I always say do that thing you are afraid to do even when you are afraid. WTG for doing it afraid! 

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 23:05h, 17 February

      YAS for doing it afraid!! You must be so proud of yourself for doing it anyway. I need to head to your blog, I want to know more. 

      Thank you for the kind words :))

  • eclechick
    Posted at 11:30h, 18 February

    You’ll do/are doing just fine. So glad that you made the jump and are fully embracing it with open arms. I’ve read your Glam.com posts and smile (like I really know you), Proud of you Chan! I can’t help but think of that time I asked “Channy are you ok, are you ok Channy?” Gotta love my silly for the MJ remix. See you soon.

    • Channing in the City
      Posted at 23:59h, 19 February

      You kill me when you say that, Re, you do know me! And when you come visit, we’re going to hang out and do hood rat things. Thank you, for the kind words 🙂 LOL, whenever you do that, I get a good laugh. I love that remix!

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