28 Things

04 Mar 28 Things

Experts say it takes 21 days to form a habit.

I want to test this theory, giving myself 28 days to form 28 news habits. Now that I’m newly 28 and all.

My mother would call me hard-headed, but I think I just like to see things for myself. You can tell me whatever you want, but until I’ve experienced it, well, you know how that goes.

Admittedly, 27 was really hard and left me questioning a lot of things. But as that Zora Neale Hurston quote goes, “There are years that ask questions and years that answer.”

28 will answer a lot of those things. I can see that now.

And in order for me to give those “answers” the best environment to grow, so to speak, to have the best results intentionally, here are 28 things I will do in my new year (hold me accountable!):

1. Make dinner. I hate cooking for myself. I eat like a bird small portions frequently, so all of my slaving over a hot stove is wasted on this party of one. I vow to do better.

2. Use Apple Cider Vinegar as a toner. The other day, I was reading old blog posts. Something that I’ve found myself doing a lot, and one thing I noticed was how well-behaved my skin was. I attribute this to the ACV. I took shots of it in the morning, put it in my tea, rubbed it on blemishes. My skin was smoother and brighter. Now it looks like New York pollution. Yuck.

3. Hang up/put away my clothes as soon as I take them off. Here’s the thing about living in a studio, even with the slight alcove where my bed hides, I can see just about all of my apartment at any given time, save for the front door and the bathroom. When I can’t figure out what to wear, or go too long between cleaning sessions, my fuchsia velvet loveseat begins look like a laundry hamper. And that’s no good. I’m one of those people who can’t focus when I’m in the middle of a mess, so in order for me to get anything remotely productive down when I get home, the apartment should be conducive to thinking creatively.

4. Take shots of ACV in the morning and evening. The benefits of drinking apple cider vinegar are never-ending. Not just in terms of what it will do for my skin but also for my bones, cholesterol and heart health. I know, I’m showing my age here.

5. Look into apple tv/cancel cable. My TV, more often than not, is off. I only seem to watch award shows, Scandal, How to Get Away with Murder and now Being Mary Jane live. I will quicker open up my laptop to watch HBOGo, something on Hulu or Amazon Prime. And there is always a Netflix password floating around that I can use. This is really just money that could go into a savings account.

6. Take more style risks. I wear the same 3 skirts and the same 4 shirts. I’m sure you’ve realized that based on what I’m wearing in my blog posts. Heading out to shoot outfits, ____ was like, ‘Hey where are all of your gloves?’ A nice way of being like, bish, give us some variety!

7. Use more NYC in my blog posts. I know a lot of you read my blog for a peek into New York life and I want to do you proud. I’m going to show you more of the city that has my heart.

8. Be the blogger I want to read. Last year, I had so many ideas that I didn’t bring to life on the blog. When I started this site I had a vision of what I hoped it would grow into and slowly but surely, it has. I want to continue to develop that so that it reflects those ideas.

9. Pack my lunches. If I make my dinners, and I’ve already gone grocery shopping so that I can, I should repurpose the meal to make lunch for the next day. It doesn’t have to be something big or fancy, but paying for convenience and buying lunch adds up. Maybe I’ll learn to recreate my favorite salad from Chop’t.

10. Bring my own coffee to work. Listen, Mint.com gets me all the way together. Every week, Saturday specifically, before I’m about to go out and spend, inevitably, what will be too much money, I get these emails with my weekly spending habits. While they have tapered off significantly since I got laid off–you don’t even want to know how much I used to spend at DryBar–the leading cause of my funds rapidly decreasing (besides rent) is food. I’m looking at you, Seamless. I’m not allowed to pay for coffee. It all adds up. I could have bought another bag with the money spent on coffee alone.

11. Devotionals in the morning and evenings. It’s not lost on me that when I feel like I’m floating aimlessly through life, I haven’t been spending time with God. For some reason, for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been waking up at least an hour earlier than my alarm was set to go off. I think, and I could be wrong, but I think this is God’s way of nudging me to do better.

12. Write one thing I’m grateful for every night and put it in my gratitude jar. I used to be in the habit of writing a nightly gratitude list. Not making one is one of the most pitiful things ever because even if I want better, I, at the very least have an apartment, people who love me and live in New York City. It isn’t all bad.

13. Make my own stationary. I like sending cards and my mother has raised me to send out thank yous when someone does something nice for me (one landed me my last job!). I’m going to let people know when I think of them by putting a little something in the mail.

14. Go out of the country. Traveling has really opened my eyes. My girlfriends are in the midst of trying to plan another big getaway similar to our London, Paris and Barcelona trip.

15. Start making YouTube videos again. It’s fun and a really good way for me to further diversify my resume by working on my editing skills. Also, I liked the video component that was happening on my blog a couple years ago.

16. Go off the grid on Sundays. Even if I am working for a million different companies, Sundays are for me. I’m going to hang out with my mentee. Plan my blog content for the week. Make sure I’m recharging myself doing what makes me happiest.

17. Call my father once a week. Because I should. Like actually dial his phone number and not speak to him via the speaker on my mom’s phone or have her shout things to him in the background.

18. Stop wearing the same bag everyday. Laziness killed this street style star (in the making). I’m only my most creative on laundry day or when I actually decide that I will wear something other than what’s right under my nose.

19. Go on non-writing dates with my mentee. I was worried when I met her that I wouldn’t have much to offer her. I realize now she just needs someone to listen. And I like being that for her. I’m grateful for whatever piece of her life she decides to share with me and hope to nurture it. It takes a village, yall.

20. Don’t kill my plant. The lovely ladies at Spylight, as a thank you for my interest in their company, sent over an air plant. It’s so cute and I haven’t killed it yet. Now I think I want to branch out and grow an herb garden. Check me out!

20. Get involved. I’ve been thinking about this a lot. I’m not sure in what capacity, but I want to do something with or for the homeless. I’m researching organizations now but even if it’s just serving dinner at a soup kitchen once a month, I need to do better.

21. Pray as hard as I do when I’m down as I do when I’m up. While I think the frequency that I pray has greatly increased since moving to New York, I’m most earnest when I’m scared or worried. I will pray with that same fervor when I’m up that I do when I’m down.

22. Wear more pants. What started out as a thing of convenience, I’m 4’11 and a size 0/2, nothing fits me right off the rack, especially not pants, turned into a lifestyle. #NoPantsAllowed isn’t just the name of my apt’s WIFI, that’s how I feel. There isn’t ever an occasion when I don’t feel my best in a skirt or a dress. But now, that’s changing a bit. Maybe it’s New York, maybe it’s Bae, but pants are growing on me. I feel so serious in them.

23. Host more, starting with #CheersTo28. I like inviting people into my space. One of my friends, Sam, put it perfectly, it’s like the museum of Channing, with a hint of real life Carrie Bradshaw. The night I was to turn 28, I sent out an email inviting a few friends into that space for a birthday toast that upcoming Saturday. We went through 5 bottles of champagne. I didn’t expect anyone to stay as long as they did. A very warm welcome to 28 if I may say so.

24. Wash my face with cold water. I mean, it works for Pharrell and he said Naomi Campbell gave him the tip. So yeah, operation preserve my skin starts now. The other day, my blogger boo Janae, told me that she thought I was 23, and let me tell you, I was so tickled. Here’s to looking 23 forever, ever.

25. Develop a real savings plan. Sh*t’s getting real now. And writers notoriously struggle. Zora dead penniless in an unmarked grave. Not to be morbid here, but short of marrying rich (which I intend to do–kidding, not really #CentralParkWest), I need to make sure that I can take care of myself.

26. Use affirmations. I believe I mentioned to you how I have a tendency to suffer in silence while I figure things out, shutting people off. Setting affirmations, reminding me of my goals and what’s in reach for me, will keep me from jumping into a pit of crazy. Plus there is something to be said about setting an intention, you begin to act as if it’s actually true.

27. Have long-standing dates with my friends. Another thing I’ve come to realize, I’m a little more introspective than I give myself credit for, is that when I put a distance between my friends and I, I don’t do well, either. I’m not one of those girls who doesn’t get along with other girls. I need mine. Especially because they are the true definition of a friend: knowing the song in your heart and singing it back to you when you forget the words.

28. Develop multiple streams of income. Since I was laid off my blog has been a financial saving grace. Now, I’m going to stop being lazy implementing multiple lines of income through not just my blog but freelance work and side projects.

#CheersTo28,